dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Randomize
