i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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