her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
