At least make sure they are 18
Why
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Randomize
