long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
