Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Randomize
