Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
