I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
