HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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