Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
