we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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