You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
