Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Non-Jews are for practice
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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