Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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