so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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