Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Randomize
