Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
