D3 body, D1 cock
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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