sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
