yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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