Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
this will be a night to untag.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
