One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
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