We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
