I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
i now understand why vodka
Randomize