If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
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