??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
