Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
