i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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