Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
