Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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