I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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