He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
