chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
