so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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