I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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