Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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