u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
