we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
