i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
