he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
40s are totally the cure
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize
