shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
BRING THE BAGELS
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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