I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize