Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
