guys are not supposed to queef...right?
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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