It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
