we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
is this the sara with the beer cane?
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
