He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
