you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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