I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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