like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
